Tracy:
"Sickness"
how do you find
something you never lost
when you search left and right
and all your paths are crossed
when the world falls in around
the sound of empty
nothing is a constant reality
of complacency
when all that you touch
is far from sanity
laughter a shrill enemy
defeating silence in consistency
breathing inside my mind
festering like a sickness forcing control
leaving me listless and shallow
taking it's tole
slowly killing all that I know
I feel the danger
in being a stranger
in my own head
not even recognizing
the lies I have been fed
from my own mouth they pour
cutting silence to the core
I find comfort in half truths
and misplaced lies
they shelter me
in my own demise
cunningly reminding me
I am sick, binding me
coming all to quickly
playing with my mind
sweet treachery
heavy words lay thick
in my twisted madness
I find solace in sadness
face first I descend
plummeting I fall to you my friend
my heart is bare
I see it there
detached but so afraid
of life in this bed that I have made
twas here I fell and here I stayed
left to dwell reliving the mistakes
that I have made
so many times
to god I prayed
for second chances
that never come
between second glances
that leave me numb
the sickness breathing inside my mind
when I search for sleep that I never find
and I could sleep for a thousand years
but no matter the time it could never erase
my endless fears or my tear stained face
I would find my self still trying to retrace
my steps back to the peaceful place
yet all that I have is this empty space
so how do you find
something you never lost
when you search left and right
and all your paths are crossed
when the world falls in around
the sound of empty
nothing is a constant reality
of complacency
© Tracy VZ
